1 Corinthians 7 - Yes - Get Married!

I love the dialogue in this chapter.  It’s not really dialogue.  But you can almost hear Paul talking, explaining the answer to the Corinthian’s question about marriage.  His answer is kinda like, "Yes, for the love of God, get married, stay married, and do things God’s way."

I wish we heard preaching on this chapter more often.  Frankly, I wish we’d have discussed it more with our kids when they were young.  My parents got married young.  They started dating in their teens and were married early 20s.  Kari and I did the same.  I’m happy we did as I don’t think we’d have had the same energy for five kids had we started later.  But this passage isn’t about the “right” age to get married.  It’s not about that.  There is no set age.  We know people who waited until their later years to get married and they have wonderful marriages.  However, the principles in this section lead to the conclusion that it is better to get married young to deal with the crisis of sexual immorality - to nip it in the bud if you will.

        I’ve heard people talking about the Bible saying it doesn’t say anything about marriage.  What?  Read the Bible.  It speaks of marriage from start to finish.  A godly marriage is sacred.  It’s God’s institution.  It is the bedrock of the family, and the community, and a key ingredient to the health of God’s church.  I’m thankful that my daughter and son-in-law are both believers and follow God in their marriage.  There is a God blessed holiness for their children and their family because of Christ (7:14).  I’m proud of them.  I can’t wait for my four sons to get married.  I know they will be godly husbands and dads and I pray God blesses them each with a treasure of a godly wife.   I know He will - just as He has blessed me.  I’m inspired by my brothers in Christ who show me how well they treat their wives and I see them selflessly work to put into action what Paul so boldly preaches to the Corinthians.  Being a godly man means obeying Christ and obeying the standards of this Scripture.

Paul uncharacteristically gets wordy in this passage; not that I’m one to talk.  He boils it down at the end to this principle: live and structure your life in a way that will help you serve and obey the Lord Jesus the best (v. 28).  For some that means staying single.  But that's not the standard or norm (7:2).  This all takes biblical wisdom and understanding.  It is not intuitive.  It is not about pleasing yourself.  Pursuing happiness in and of itself and for yourself will end in doom and destruction (Proverbs 2).  Sometimes you’ll hear people say, “I only want to do what makes me happy.”  Alarm bells should be going off if you are thinking that way.

Ok, so what was the crisis?  It was (6:9-10) (and is (look around you)) a crisis of sexual immorality.  Why exactly do our churches not preach and preach well this passage of Scripture?  Maybe they do and I’m just missing it.

        Some things seem to never change, but we must do our best to make the Church the Bride of Christ that God expects her to be (Ephesians 5:22-32).  Paul has an answer to this problem of sexual sin for the believer in Christ.  Church, let’s put this advice into practice today.  Young men, nay, all men.  Please listen to God's message: you should have your own wife.  Find her.  Keep her.  Give her the honor Jesus demands we give.  Sacrifice for her and love her the way God explains we should.  Marriage is sacred and key to God’s purpose for your life.  A godly wife is a treasure, a gift from God.  It’s the same for every young woman: you should have your own husband (7:2).  That’s God’s expectation for you.  Simple enough I suppose.

We see in chapter six (and replete throughout Scripture) the severe consequence of sexual sin.  And here we are reminded it is Satan who is involved in tempting us and the danger in this area of sexual relations.  There is a serious risk in not heeding this passage’s commands for the Christian (whatever our age).  Satan, sin, and seductive words - all reality.  Satan is cagey.  He'll trap you right when you think you're at the top of your game.  Following God’s way will bring blessings and save us from disaster (Proverbs 2).  This is one of the paradoxes of Christian marriage.  With it comes challenges, suffering, responsibilities, troubles, and even deep piercing of the heart (v. 28).  But marriage is also God’s conduit of every good blessing, every good gift on the path of life.  True satisfaction.  True happiness.

So, to repeat, Paul’s clear message to Christians is to get married, stay married, and take your responsibilities to your spouse seriously.

        Men - let me speak to you.  Give your head a shake and get the right godly mindset.  The message here for the Christian man is to fulfill his wife’s sexual needs and to give her authority over his body in this area of sexual relations.  Your body is her area of authority.  No one else, no matter what, can have that authority over you.  Give it to her and make sure she knows she alone has it for life.  This mindset and the behavior that comes with it is sacred and ordained by Jesus Christ, our God, and our Savior.  God knows your situation - He knows your prayers - He is there with you and He will bless you, your wife, and your children because of your holiness.  Let us keep God’s commandments.

Lord Jesus, we repent of our sexual sin and our acceptance of non-Christian standards, and our self-deception.  Help us to encourage young people to find and keep godly spouses and to build marriages built on the solid foundation of Jesus Christ.  Thank you for marriage, Lord God.  Thank You for the principle of structuring our lives in whatever way helps us serve You the best.  May I be mindful of that today in all I do and say.  Amen.

 

A letter from my three-year-old grandson to me.